One of the most difficult aspects of online dating to overcome is chatting someone up online. Inevitably you miss out on body language and tone of voice cues among other things that can lead you to misconstrue what she is saying, or give her the wrong impression of you. Although it is easy enough to find reviews of sites to meet women, it is a lot more difficult to find tips for coming off certain ways in online chats. Before you start looking for tips, you need to read the website reviews to meet women carefully. Here is a top 5 chart for you. If you want to have online sex, then you need to approach a woman accordingly. Focus on your chatting skills. Most people have a hard enough time explaining why they reacted a certain way to various posts and emails they read through on a daily basis: trying to figure out what someone else thinks might seem like an impossible task to conquer. There are, however, some easy rules to follow that an at least help you get your point across without suffering from the typical issues that arise.
Sarcasm Is Your Enemy
If you thought choosing your words was difficult half sloshed at a bar in Leeds, relying on something that is typically inferred through tone of voice when you don’t actually have one is like shooting yourself in the foot. Sarcasm has a lot of issues when it comes to meeting someone for the first time, anyway. Trying to make use of it in an online context where you cannot as reliably emphasize your words to make it easy to understand that you mean them sarcastically is just asking for trouble. How many forum threads have you seen go awry just due to someone taking something the wrong way, only to have it resolved pages later or not at all? Do you really want to take the chance of suffering the same fate in a situation when you probably aren’t going to get pages and pages of discussion to reframe you point and snag a second chance?
Generally speaking, anything that increases the chance for being rejected isn’t just risky, but just foolish to bother with. Unless you know someone well in the first place, even in person sarcasm have one heck of a recoil. Trusting yourself to do any better in an online scenario just really doesn’t lend itself to positive outcomes. Yes, that includes blatantly pointing out that you comment was meant to be sarcastic from the get go. It’s a lot easier to write something like that off in person if it doesn’t go over well. As fleeting as the Internet often seems to be, always remember that whatever you put online might as well be written in stone. Trying to recover after she reacts poorly to something you wrote is a lot harder than recovering from something you said. At least in the later case, you can usually fudge over word choice after the fact. If she doesn’t appreciate sarcasm, you can also tell much quicker in person. In general, it’s best to just stay away from anything that requires a tone of voice to really understand when you are communicating through text.
Spelling and Grammar Are Actually Useful
Chatting online doesn’t necessarily mean you need to show off your grammar school credentials. While you can often get your point across without paying attention to things like periods and halfway decent capitalization, the fact of the matter is that it is a heck of a lot easier to understand when you do. It may not occur to you since most of the time we spend reading is often spent on things that have already been through the editorial process, but double checking your spelling and making sure your grammar follows some form of logic always makes your writing easier to read. Think of the first time you were introduced to a new language and how much easier it was to understand formal and polite conversation and writing compared to trying to learn slang in foreign tongue. Chances are, the slang was good deal more difficult than the rest. The same affect applies to grammar and spelling in reviews of sites to meet women and other online communication. In fact, it is even more pronounced online, because there is an even greater chance of people not sharing the same background and therefore not understanding the same abbreviations and grammatical omissions. In short, try to stick to something that looks vaguely publishable and you’ll make yourself more accessible.
Emoticons: Finding the Balance
When it comes to the little pictures you can make with letters and other characters to illustrate your point or just make a face, people tend to fail into one of two camps: never using them, or completely overloading on them. Generally speaking, the more you want someone to take you seriously, the less likely you are to use emoticons at all. Even reviews of sites to meet women, although relatively casual, usually won’t include emoticons or other ascii characters just because it doesn’t suit the tone of a proper review. That doesn’t mean emoticons have no place in online chats, however. In fact, it is just the opposite. Emoticons help us overcome the limits of text by allowing us to return some of the missing tone of voice plain sentences usually lack. Therefore, it’s actually a good habit to get into adding them every once in a while to make sure you get your point across the way you want it to be taken.
The important thing here is to not overdo it. We all know that one girl that adds winks and sticks her tongue out at the end of everything she types, and coming off the same way to someone we’re trying to impress really doesn’t appeal. Neither does it usually work very well. On the other hand, completely removing emoticons from our chat entirely often makes it come off more rigid and formal than you may realize. If you need a good measure, we suggest once every three submissions. If you write a sentence before sending each time, it’s once every three sentences. If you write a paragraph, it’s once every other paragraph. In this way, you help clarify your meaning while at the same time remaining casual and not coming off as an eager teenager spamming pictures he just looked up during the chat.
Disrupting the Flow of the Conversation
This is a little more obvious in person, but since we can’t all live in Leeds, it’s a good idea to get a feel for this in online conversation. That is to say, if you are texting back and forth, in a private chat room or instant messaging session, learning when to lay off the keys is a really good skill to have. We’ve noticed it’s very common for most guys to write a thought, submit it, then immediately follow up with the next thought on and on until they have written nearly a paragraph but with sentence fragments on their own lines. This is choppy and will most likely make her stop and wait longer than needed just to make sure you’re done before replying. More than likely, you’ll end up interrupting her text as well if you do this. Instead, stick to either only writing a complete thought in full sentences and submitting it, or keeping your responses short and waiting for her to reply before continuing.